Avoiding The Inferno
Mary -BrytEyz- Ball
Age Rating: 16 +
Regarding the darkness of my poetry,
the one thing about poetry
is the pain within it is then timeless.
Perhaps I felt sad for only a moment,
but then if I write about it...
that pain lives on forever.
Unfortunately, if people read all my work,
they then think I am a very depressed soul.
You, my dear one, surely know
that this is NOT the case.
I am a pretty happy person
with bright eyes - BrytEyz.
I have a positive outlook
and expect the best out of life
at every turn.
Although I've had a rough life,
I have had many blessings as well.
See, I believe happiness is a choice.
There is good and bad in every day...
in every moment ... and
we see what we want to see out of it.
If you wake up and say,
"Why am I sad?"
Believe me, you find a reason!
But if you wake up and ask,
"Why should I smile?"
Again, you will find a reason!
I am just too stubborn to NOT smile.
See, if I fail to obtain happiness...
then I feel I have let this world win.
I am a soldier and fight daily
to win this battle.
Every once in awhile,
I lose the battle and begin to write.
But... most of the time I win.
In the end,
I WILL win the entire war.
When I pass from the scene of this world,
people will hopefully remember me
as a happy person,
thankful for each
and every day I was granted,
and as someone who tried
at every turn
to enrich the lives of those
whom I've been blessed to know.
One other thing I think
important enough to share...
As you must be intelligent
I'm sure it's obvious to you
that I have been trying hard
lately to "behave" ... unfortunately
for awhile, I was anything but.
I have within me the power
to turn men into puppets.
However, it's an addiction...
the power to tame the wild
and to succumb to desire myself,
and if I let loose...
it becomes a raging fire
that soon gets out of control.
The sound of grown men,
whimpering like little girls
during intimate times
is an achievement
not many women experience.
Power is a monster and an inferno.
As I do not wish to burn,
or to get burned in this way,
I have been avoiding the fire.
In trying to refrain
and behave on my part,
it's only so I don't get burned.
Please understand it's not YOU,
but as I've written before...
you could be very dangerous!
There's just something about you
that brings me to the very ledge every time,
that makes me want to try it all again.
You at times seem like a goal to be achieved,
and although I'm sure you'd love the race...
the finish is not always fun.
I so wish to keep you as my friend.
I know, you think yourself a lady's man
and perhaps you are. Believe me,
I feel it in much of what you say & do.
But in the end, however,
I do not want another ex-lover...
but a friendship that will last.
You are much too valuable a person
to lose in that fashion.
Anyway, if you read hints
of an inner passion...
it's because of you.
And if you do not...
it's because of me.
I just wanted you to know
I'm attempting to avoid the inferno
I once wrote something similar to a suitor and would be lover as I explained my my nickname "BrytEyz", my poetry, and why sometimes "women" seemingly change their minds. Three totally different topics all rolled up into one moving explanation. As for the women changing their minds part, one moment they appear to want more as they shamelessly firt, and then when their advances are reacted upon... they indignantly back away. This would be Romeo and Don Juan wanna be just couldn't understand. I did not want to be one of his conquests, and I did not want him to be one of mine. Instead, the friendship we'd forged was much too valuable and I chose it instead of the momentary roller coaster ride.