Original Poetry and Stories
Our Midi Musicbox *
Save Cookie?  
Forgot Password?

When I write

by niteangel
copyright 04-13-2012

Age Rating: 10 +

When I need a chance

To escape planet Earth

I am warmly welcome

By this magic world

In which I can

Do anything Be anything

I want

I wish

Like soar the sky

On a unicorns furry back

Or lunge into the deepest sea

Hanging by a serpents scaly tail

Searching for clues with Sherlock Holmes

Or fight a knight By Hercules's side

It seems as though

Each letter

Each word

Peels one by one off the pages

And forms a swirling tornado

Rotating faster and faster

Until I am barely visible

It suddenly halts and falls to the ground

Like dry leaves in autumn

As I put down my magic tool

My fantasy fades

The fog clears

I must loathfully return

To the real world

Where I impatiently await

To continue my


Visitor Reads: 461
Total Reads: 468

Author's Page
Email the Author
Add a Comment

Comments on this Article/Poem:
Click on the commenter's name to see their Author's Page

        05-24-2012     Anthony Lane Stahlhut        

To find a path is to find a way to express what you have to say and you found one here! I agree that with a better format you could express what you feel better, but your words ring true and I do enjoy the things that you feel in this write! Anthony

        05-24-2012     Frank Fields        

This is presented as a solid wall of text with no punctuation, no stopping points for the reader to catch his/her breath, so to speak. It's very hard to read, even an experimental piece, presented in this manner. I think you would help this work tremendously by following a more traditional format. I'll look forward to reading an edited version, if you should want to make a simple change or two. Please.

Frank :)

        05-14-2012     Salvador Ortega        

ok cool. like what you wrote.but it looks and reads like a paragraph. I would have spaced each thought to a new line so that way the poem reads like a step. it starts at the top and goes down like a set of stairs. till it reaches the bottom. Thanks keep up the good work

left curlique right curlique
About PnP Privacy Points Terms of Service Banners Contact Us F.A.Q