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I've Fallen In Love (The Out-takes)

by Mary -BrytEyz- Ball (Age: 47)
copyright 06-18-2002

Age Rating: 7 +

I once was a child when so much younger
But then I grew just a little stronger
Transormed into a teen when I "grew up"
With infinite knowledge and endless luck
Now, a new phase, I'm faced with adulthood
Becoming one with my own womanhood
Nothing to me has been this frightening...
like a storm in life wrought with lightning!

Finally alone, and afraid I stood
where fearless folks often would
And then I realized that there I was
and had to admit that I'd become
All I'd admired about my mother
and all good qualities of any other
I've finally fallen in love with who I am
Because I now realize that I can!
Wasn't sure what to do with this...
I'm not happy with it, but am working on it still.
I wasn't going to post it but it seems there are folks that need to read something positive... and so I thought what my mother said just might be true... it's the thought that counts. *smile*
- BrytEyz (6-18-02)
Well, who thought it would take me TWO YEARS to come back to this, eh? I've amended a couple awkward parts and would love to know if anyone has any other suggestions. Oh, and thanks to Gregory Christiano. You are a marvlous voice here on PnP and I cherish your advice/opinions immensely! Thank you very much.
- BrytEyz (9-5-04)

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        01-20-2005     Anthony Lane Stahlhut        

This is great...what about the line " Becoming one with my own womanhood." changed to " Becoming one trying to be understood." They are both good,but you said you wanted us to think about it(bet you think thats a mistake now! Ha Ha) Thanks, Anthony

        09-03-2004     Gregory Christiano        

You don't have to do anything more with this exceptional poem. The passion is there right through the step-by-step journey into being an adult. It is like following a path of life, just as you described. Nicely done.

        11-15-2002     Mary -BrytEyz- Ball        

Thanks all.. and CL... I'll never forget. How can you forget magic?

        11-14-2002     Audrey Sullivan        


        06-18-2002     William Robbins        

Self discovery is such a wonderful journey. Thanks for saying it in verse.

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